Other Quotes

These are quotes from other people that I like:

"Did momma take the titties away too soon?"
-Lamont Cranston

"Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."
-Unknown

"War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left. "
-Unknown

"I once prayed to god for a bike, but quickly found out he didn't work that way...so I stole a bike and prayed for his forgiveness."
-Unknown

"If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?"
-Unknown

"If you think things can't get worse it's probably only because you lack sufficient imagination."
-Unknown

"A train station is where the train stops. A bus station is where the bus stops. On my desk, I have a work station... "
-Unknown

"My god carries a hammer. Your god died nailed to a post. Any questions? "
-Unknown

"You can't be late until you show up."
-Unknown

"Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way, wisdom is looking both directions anyway."
-Unknown

"Malice drinks one half of its own poison."
-Lucius Annaeus Seneca

"Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body."
-Lucius Annaeus Seneca

"Many things have fallen only to rise higher."
-Lucius Annaeus Seneca

"Procrastination is like masturbation... its fun at first, but then you just realize you are fucking yourself."
-Unknown

"I bet she does it like a weasel."
-Sigekuni "FLCL"

"I don't just want to feel kinky, I want to feel *abnormally* kinky"
-Yami

"Happiness is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it but only you can truly feel its warmth."
-Unknown

"Women are funny; if they start thinking about something that bothers them, they can't have an orgasm. With a guy, you gotta break a pencil off of his penis. Women look at orgasms as something they give away. It's like, 'I'm giving you my orgasm, I'm having an orgasm for you.' Guys just want to get rid of their orgasm; they're not looking to keep it at all."
-Adam Carolla "Loveline"

"Sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."
-Lewis Carroll

Anya: "I love a ritual sacrifice."
Buffy: "Not really a one of those."
Anya: "To commemorate a past event, you kill and eat an animal. It's a ritual sacrifice, with pie."
-Buffy The Vampire Slayer "Pangs"

"Many ideas grow better when transplanted into another mind other than the one where they sprang up."
-Oliver Wendell Holmes

"To create something you must be something."
-Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

"The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
-Albert Einstein

"People that drive a gas guzzling SUV and they put a flag on it, you know that's like a whore wearing a rosary."
-Paul Gilmartin

"A Native American elder once described his own inner struggles in this manner: Inside of me there are two dogs. One of the dogs is mean and evil. The other dog is good. The mean dog fights the good dog all the time. When asked which dog wins, he reflected for a moment and replied, The one I feed the most."
-George Bernard Shaw

"Sometimes a majority only means that all the fools are on the same side."
-Unknown

"If you're going through hell...keep going."
-Winston Churchill

"I've had a wonderful evening, but this wasn't it."
-Groucho Marx

"An adventure is an inconvenience properly considered"
-Neil Gaiman

"I dare you to make less sense."
-Unknown

"The future is already here, it's just not evenly distributed."
-William Gibson

"A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject. "
-Sir Winston Churchill

"Adaptation is compromise."
-Illyria, Angel "Time Bomb"

"Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under."
-H. L. Mencken

"Don't be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Shoot your murders like love scenes, and your love scenes like murders."
-Alfred Hitchcock

"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public."
-H.L. Mencken

"The future is a slut. She promises herself to everyone."
-Unknown

"If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space."
-Unknown

"Imagination is more important than knowledge."
- Albert Einstein

"If you find yourself in a fair fight, you didn't plan your mission properly."
-Unknown

"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
-Unknown

"Quite the opposite, my dear Kadigeaira (I'm not looking up how you spell that dreck). I was using a modicum of humor to underscore a very real problem on Usenet. You're merely the punctuation mark. "
-Unknown

"It is no measure of mental health to be adjusted to a messed up society"
-Unknown

"Today is the tomorrow you were worried about yesterday. Was it worth it?"
-Unknown

"People who think that real issues are about liberals vs conservatives, or visa versa, full of anecdotes about how stupid the other side is are generally morons who cling to polarity in a state of mental insecurity."
-John P Sheehy

"I can speak to people anywhere in the world, I can get any information I want, I can go to New Zealand in 0.384 seconds, so why the fuck would I want to go outside?"
-Unknown

"I can write better than anybody who can write faster; and I can write faster than anybody who can write better."
-A. J. Liebling

"You never truly understand a thing until you can explain it to your grandmother.
-Albert Einstein

"I am convinced that the only people worthy of consideration in this world are the unusual ones. For the common folk are like leaves of a tree, and live and die unnoticed."
-The Scarecrow of Oz "The Marvelous Land of Oz" by Frank L. Baum

"If you want to understand the conflict over gay marriage, there is a simple method. Whenever you hear or read anything whatsoever about the topic, mentally replace the words 'homosexual', 'gay', and 'lesbian' with the words 'mixed-race' or 'mixed-religion'. That's all there is to it. The same arguments were used before, the same fears of the end of civilization were spouted, the same claims of good versus evil were demanded, and the same concerns about insult to morality were loudly proclaimed. It is the same ignorance, and the same blind, bigoted hatred."
-Jennifer Diane Reitz

"My candle burns at both ends;
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends—
It gives a lovely light!"
-Edna St. Vincent

"Science has done more for the development of western civilization in one hundred years than Christianity did in eighteen hundred years."
-John Burroughs

"Occasionally some people open themselves up for a good thrashing. It's just good manners to give them what they ask for."
-Unknown

[Counting victims as he snipes at them.]
"1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7... Oswald was a fag."
-The Usual Suspects

"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. "
-Unknown

"And I'm not just talkin' fat, I'm talkin' ORCA fat. "
-Unknown

"Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television. Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers...choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit crushing game shows, stuffing junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourself. Choose a future. Choose life... But why would I want to do a thing like that?"
-Trainspotting

"Look at 'em, ordinary fucking people, I hate 'em."
-Unknown

"Nobody likes you. Everybody hates you. You're gonna lose. Smile, you fuck."
-Bruce Willis

"I am Zathras. Zathras got here by being Zathras. Zathras wants nothing, so Zathras gets nothing. That is life."
-Babylon 5

"Microsoft Windows: A thirty-two bit extension and graphical shell to a sixteen bit patch to an eight bit operating system originally coded for a four bit microprocessor which was written by a two-bit company that can't stand one bit of competition."
-Unknown

"Theft from a single author is plagiarism.
Theft from two is comparative study.
Theft from three or more is research."
-Unknown

"In most instances, all an argument proves is that two people are present."
-Unknown

"No matter what the result is, there will always be someone eager to misinterpret it, fake it, or believe it happened according to his own pet theory.
-Unknown

"If something cannot go wrong at all, it will go wrong in a very spectacular way. "
-Unknown

"He who is victorious over others is strong, but he who is victorious over himself is all-powerful."
-Unknown

"Winning a war is just as possible as winning an earthquake."
-Unknown

"God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time."
-Unknown

Things which you see as stupid can almost ALWAYS be explained by your own ignorance.
-Me (okay, so the last one was mine, LOL)